Vicky beeching dating
I felt there was something really wrong with me, that maybe I was so sinful and awful I couldn't be healed."She reached her first breaking point that year.One night alone in her bedroom, still just 13 years old, the schism between feelings and beliefs overcame her."I felt like it was ripping me in half. I was trying to align the loving God I knew and believed in with this horrendous reality of what was going on inside me," she says.The day she handed in the master tapes for what was to be her last album, she went to the doctor's, expecting to be handed some E45 cream."They said, 'You need to sit down. It's an auto-immune disease called linear scleroderma morphea, and a form of the disease called coup de sabre.' It's a degenerative condition where soft tissue turns to scarring.At that point they didn't know if it was just localised or whether it would affect my whole body." In the worst cases, one's whole body can turn to scar tissue, including internal organs. Beeching was told she would need extensive chemotherapy and to expect hair loss, weight gain and exhaustion.
I said to God, 'You have to either take my life or take this attraction away because I cannot do both.'" Her eyes glisten for the first time.Her face has a divine, ethereal, bone- structure-to-die-for beauty, like Sharon Stone suppressing her basic instincts.All of this, however, looks different, harrowed, when Beeching describes the attempts to cure her lesbianism.Anybody I was in a friendship with, or anything I was doing in the church, was accompanied by an internal mantra: 'What if they knew?' It felt like all of my relationships were built on this ice that would break if I stepped out on to it."Beeching is cross-legged on a sofa in my living-room, deportment impeccable, done up in a tailored jacket, made up with absolute precision.Instead, all her energy went in to work: the grades took her to Oxford (where she lived in a Christian halls of residence); at 23, the songwriting took her to Nashville.For the next six years, Beeching lived in the fire-and-brimstone heart of conservative America, recording albums and touring the country's vast churches.It feels a bit mean to pick one," she replies, chiming with an earlier comment: "I'm not angry with the Church."Instead, she takes herself back to that day."I remember sitting in my seat at this big conference, with about 4,000 people.By 16, the isolation, fear and shame were escalating.Her mother, who is very musical, had taught her to play the piano and guitar, and Beeching was already writing worship songs and performing them at services in front of hundreds.